Welcome to Michael's Article Collection

Growing From Good To Great

I have never been fond of white-water rafting, probably because I don’t like cold water. The sport consists of a raft, fast moving cold water, raft riders, and a raft leader/guide. I once saw a picture of a group of girls out for some white-water rafting fun. The girls in the picture were all smiling and waving to the camera while the leader’s eyes were straining to see down stream. No doubt he. . .

Get More Personal

Most folks who know me, know that when people write me I always like to write back and show how much I appreciate the message. I do stay busy, but taking the time to write back is something that's very important to me.Well friends, the other day I slipped up! (See even I can admit my mistakes... lol. After all that's how we grow isn't it?). You see I received a message from a person that had tw. . .

Demand Dignity in Public Speaking Training (c)

Mandy*, a bright, attractive professional woman, had a fear of speaking in front of groups. Recognizing that her feelings of vulnerability and self-consciousness were limiting her potential, she showed up for a presentation skills class filled with trepidation. In the class, the students spent the morning listening to the instructor explain the rules of public speaking. That afternoon, they gav. . .

Positive thinking on negativity

The other day I bought an unusual piece of software: It runs positive affirmations on my computer, so they can influence me while I work. Sentences like “I am full of confidence” or “I love everyone I meet”. The kind that is supposed to help me so that I stop being negative.  I liked the idea, but much to my surprise, it didn’t feel completely right.I just couldn’t understand why. After all, I. . .

The Shattered Identity

I. ExpositionIn the movie "Shattered" (1991), Dan Merrick survives an accident and develops total amnesia regarding his past. His battered face is reconstructed by plastic surgeons and, with the help of his loving wife, he gradually recovers his will to live. But he never develops a proper sense of identity. It is as though he is constantly ill at ease in his own body. As the plot unravels, Dan. . .

On Being Human

Are we human because of unique traits and attributes not shared with either animal or machine? The definition of "human" is circular: we are human by virtue of the properties that make us human (i.e., distinct from animal and machine). It is a definition by negation: that which separates us from animal and machine is our "human-ness".We are human because we are not animal, nor machine. But such. . .

10 Red Flags In Dating Relationships

When starting a new relationship, many women (and men as well) tend to overlook some behaviors in their new partner that do not bode well for the future. Then, down the road, comes the exclamation ‘If I had only known...’. As a Psychotherapist who has worked with mostly women and a few men in the field of Domestic Violence, during counseling sessions we can always trace back unpleasant and al. . .

Intuition

I. The Three IntuitionsIA. Eidetic IntuitionsIntuition is supposed to be a form of direct access. Yet, direct access to what? Does it access directly "intuitions" (abstract objects, akin to numbers or properties - see "Bestowed Existence")? Are intuitions the objects of the mental act of Intuition? Perhaps intuition is the mind's way of interacting directly with Platonic ideals or Phenomenologi. . .

Down On Your Luck? Here's How You Get Over The Hump!

It's time to put a bad rumor to rest right now. Good things don't happen to you because you have "good luck." And, bad things don't happen to you because you have "bad luck." Well then smart guy, what is it? I'm glad you asked; Read on!Time For All-Out War!Somewhere long ago, a rumor got started and spread all over the world that told us, as long as we live in this world, we have to suffer fear. . .

Share Your True Colors

Don’t you just love the leaves changing colors in the fall? Here in the Midwest we are almost at the peak of leaf peeping season. The trees are showing their true colors – glorious yellows, reds, and oranges. While they appear green during the spring and summer, those vibrant fall colors are always present, just not seen by us. As the bright green chlorophyll fades away for the winter, the . . .

Gender and the Narcissist

In the manifestation of their narcissism, female and male narcissists, inevitably, do tend to differ. They emphasise different things. They transform different elements of their personality and of their life into the cornerstones of their disorder. Women concentrate on their body (as they do in eating disorders: Anorexia Nervosa and Bulimia Nervosa). They flaunt and exploit their physical charm. . .

On Empathy

The Encyclopaedia Britannica (1999 edition) defines empathy as:"The ability to imagine oneself in anther's place and understand the other's feelings, desires, ideas, and actions. It is a term coined in the early 20th century, equivalent to the German Einfühlung and modelled on "sympathy." The term is used with special (but not exclusive) reference to aesthetic experience. The most obvious examp. . .

How To Be Motivated Without A Motivator

Many professionals spend their entire careers working under managers or supervisors that don’t truly understand the importance of motivation. This lack of understanding results in one of two things: 1) Low performance and productivity of the organization and staff or 2) Self-motivation of the professional, which results in high performance, satisfaction, and productivity. If you are in the low . . .

Lottery Winners Lose It All

You have heard it time and again. Lottery Winners lose it all and trust fund babies waste their parent's hard earned cash. In fact, up to 80% of the lottery winners in this country file bankruptcy within five years. Most of us say," That would never happen to me. You would have to be really dumb to lose all that money." Yet the very reason that these individuals let their money run through thei. . .

If Your in a Hole, Stop Digging

If you find yourself in a difficult situation, don't continue doing what you are doing. Although, it might seem like simple advice that should be common sense, remember common sense isn't. It is based on life experience. If we haven't had the experience, we might not know how to handle it. We may be under the illusion that if we keep on doing what we are doing things will change. They won'. . .

Life Can Seem Unfair......Until We Change Our Perspective...

Empty, Hollow, Nothing….those words shout the sound of disappointment and disillusionment of life for many people; the experience of many people as they grab for possessions, power, knowledge, and the sweet things of life. But, what do they find? Yeah, you guessed it, emptiness, disappointment, and the awareness that Life sucks and then you die.Well, As Luck Would Have It!Have you ever heard th. . .

Here's Your Calm During The Storm Of Discouragement

Have you ever known someone like this? "A person who knows how to start well, but finds it difficult to keep going"? A person whose successes are dependent on the quality of someone else's encouragement and motivation? Someone who consistently let's discouragement get the better of him? Ever found yourself like that? There's hope, read on.Don't Worry, Be Happy! &^%$%^Yeah right! How many times. . .

If It Feels Good, It Must Be Right

Is it possible to motivate yourself to do something you don't enjoy doing? Let me illustrate with my own example. I'm not a natural networker. I'm no good at schmoozing and talking people into doing things I want them to do. I've been told that I'm too upfront and honest for my own good. I know its true. So how did I land up in network marketing? Well, I always wanted to be a stay-at-home mom A. . .

Keeping Faith

Direct Answers - Column for the week of June 30, 2003Please bear with me. I desperately need advice. I dated this girl for a year, and we broke up many times because of religion. We are of two different religions, and she wanted our potential children to be of her faith and only her faith.To me that seemed a bit unfair. I too want to share in my children's spirituality, and I too want to ta. . .

Citizens Of The Land Of Opportunity (For July 4!)

"We hold these truths to be self-evident: That all men are created equal; that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable rights; that among these are life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness." align=right--The Declaration of Independence, July 4, 1776In a crowded, airless room in the city of Philadelphia 227 years ago this week, a group of men solemnly stepped forward, one b. . .

False Start

Direct Answers - Column for the week of July 7, 2003.I was married three months ago, and I think I may have married the wrong woman. What do I mean when I say that? I thought I was in love, and while I have strong feelings of friendship and goodwill toward her, I feel I am alone in this relationship.There is an odd feeling of disconnection and an inability to get to a state of real meaning wi. . .

Doubting Your Way To Success!....Ridiculous.....Oh?

Ever had a problem with doubts? Ever felt that nagging feeling down in the pit of your stomach that says, "It ain't gonna happen this time"? Have you ever wanted to throw in the towel and just quit? If so, you've experienced having your head full of doubts. Here is the good bad and ugly.A Horse Of A Different Color!What is a doubt? It's a state of disbelief or distrust. Well, can disbelieving i. . .

Nothing In-Between

Are you on the right track? Stop for a while, look at the map, see the directions, consult someone, seek guidance and then start your journey towards success with full confidence, without the slightest doubt of being derailed. There is a marked difference between a successful person and a failed one. Their tracks are completely different from each other leading to different destinations; the de. . .

The Top 10 Creative Strategies for Moving into Action and...

Your ability to move into action and to achieve bottom line results rests in the power of your thinking. These ten strategies will support you in transforming your desires into concrete action. 1. Expose your fears. Fear is a gift that was given to us at birth as a means of protection and to provide us with safety from harm. This innate fear often becomes distorted, and as adults, we begin to r. . .

Game-Set-Match

Direct Answers - Column for the week of July 21, 2003I don't know whether to call it jealousy or insecurity. My husband and I have been married almost 30 years. Last year at my husband's surprise birthday party, one of my friends asked who a certain woman in the room was.When I asked why, she said, "She and your husband have been making eye contact all night, and he seems to be paying her a l. . .

When Things Go Wrong As They Sometimes Will.....Don't Get...

In frustration it's easy to jump to false conclusions that life is out to get you. Wrong assumptions will invariably lead you to wrong conclusions. And, it is ridiculous to think that our limited experiences are reflective of life in general. When the struggles begin, it's time for a reality check. Time To Clear The Decks!There is probably nothing more frustrating than to assume we know how to . . .

Walking The Walk

Direct Answers - Column for the week of July 14, 2003I have a very important question. My wife moved out of the house last year with our young son and daughter. We have done some excellent counseling and made excellent progress. She actually moved back home two weeks ago. You can't believe the relief.We broke up because of my controlling personality, but there were no financial or drug prob. . .

Have You Been Lucky In Life?

Each moment in life, "lucky" or "unlucky", is to be savored, learned from, and appreciated. Easier said than done? Read this heartfelt story and see for yourself.I met an exceptional American man in Athens in my younger years. He had a beautiful and gentle French girlfriend, and everyone was always complimenting him and telling him how "lucky" he was. His usual reply was something to the effect. . .

Having the Attitude I am the Greatest!

While trying to ignore my teen daughters rap music a thought came to me. Whoever the rap artist was that she was listening to, is very positive about him self. He was negative about the women in his life, he made negative statements about the police but when it came to himself he was very positive. He used “I” statements, “I am going to be rich by the age of 24.” He visualized all the material . . .

Go Between

Direct Answers - Column for the week of June 16, 2003I enjoy reading your column every week. I want to tell you about a family problem I am having at present. Recently our youngest daughter divorced after 22 years of marriage and two teenagers. This was a great shock to all the family as she never told anyone of her unhappy situation.Now she is living with her high school sweetheart, who is . . .

If Wishes Were Horses Then Beggars Would Ride!

And if Bull frogs had wings they wouldn't bump their little rear-end when they landed. Don't make the mistake of thinking that rushing all over the place you are being your most productive self. Don't make the mistake of thinking that when you take time out for thought you are wasting your time. All play and no work makes Jack a poor boy, but, quality time in thought can turn your wishes into d. . .

8 Ways to Fill a Workshop in a Bum Economy

Yes, you can fill a workshop when spending is down and buyers are wary. If your topic is clear, your marketing materials well-done, your product solid and your title catchy, success shouldn’t be tough. The fact is that people are as hungry as ever for the inspiration and stimulus a workshop provides, even when they’re nervous about money. And even though most bum economies recover over time, yo. . .

Success; So Close, Yet So Far Away!

Have you ever had this feeling? You're standing in front of a huge safe; in this safe, is all the wealth, happiness, success, love and health the world could offer. This safe has a combination lock on it and you know all the numbers to open it, except one. :( Just one lousy number! And, if you knew that one number, you could open the door! What we need is a "safe" bet!I Don't Have A Clue!Often . . .

What My Neighbour’s Cat Taught Me About Communication

Igor is a large, muscly Russian Blue cat that loves to sleep for most of the day, get scratched under his neck and play a short game of string (has to be short – or else he falls asleep).When our neighbours are away at work, he likes to visit us and sleep in our front garden.Occasionally, he likes to grace us with his presence inside our place. To ensure we look after him in the way he is accu. . .

Make an Easy Lotion For Your Skin

Years ago I found out how incredible easy it is to make lotion. It is so inexpensive and organic that I wondered why anyone would even consider spending a dime on the chemical rich lotions on the market. Besides I had an added incentive, I have eczema, so I am extremely sensitive to what I put on my skin. Making my own lotion was a great alternative for me. To begin, for a lotion base all you n. . .

What is Stress?

What is Stress?Stress is an interpretation of an event or circumstance which is understood to be a threat. It can be any force or pressure put on a system (living or nonliving) which may result in a need for the system to adapt or change. Stress on human beings is like a rubber band. You also stretch to meet the environment around you, the demands of your lifestyle, and the pressures you put. . .

Top 10 Skills for New World of Work

There are many changes coming in the world of work, such as increased competition, the need for more education and certifications, and the trend to change careers 5-7 times in a lifetime. No matter what job or career path you decide to take, there are some basic skills that all employers look for. To succeed in the modern world of work, keep your skill set up- to- date. The following is a li. . .

Misplaced Allegiance

Direct Answers - Column for the week of June 23, 2003I am male, 30, married for seven years. I have two small children. The past several years of married life have been trying. My wife and I fight a lot, always about money, work, or sex.We used to be very passionate, in a shy sort of way, but that has all but vanished. My wife attributes it to my work ethic. If I was home more, she says, s. . .

Get To Know Yourself

Eight Baby Steps To Knowing Your “Self”Who are you? What do you stand for? What do you believe in? What engages your passion? What brings tears of gratitude and joy to your eyes? Do you know, or have you lost yourself? In my work as a professional coach, I’ve helped many people rediscover themselves. The first step on the road to rediscovery involves spending time with you, which is why . . .

The New Age Movement

New Age - A Paradigm Shift to Divine Consciousness & a Universal Philosophy The New Age Movement (NAM) is a revival of spiritual and divine values and can be called as a Divine Regeneration Movement. New Age Philosophy has conquered the West intellectually and Western culture is currently experiencing a phenomenal shift - sociological, spiritual & ideological. It's a secular, multi-cultural, . . .

Quick Fixes: Happiness in a Bottle

This is the age of the Quick Fix - the magic bullets that claim to take away our sorrows, our tiredness, our sadness.You need look no farther than your mailbox to see the range of remedies - prescription drugs and supplements - being plugged for everything from stress to low energy.In the age of modern-day stresses, of recessions and depressions, most people find it hard to resist the cure-all . . .

To Be A Champion, Become A Child

Have you ever wondered what successful people have that makes them successful?Ever wonder how those champion recruiters in your company manage, month after month, to get the most new recruits, the biggest bonuses, the largest paychecks?Well let me tell you a secret. No one starts out as a Champion. Most of them started out like you and me.So what is it that makes a Champion different from the r. . .

About That Dream...

About that Dream... Remember your very first job? That all-grown-up feeling! Your own money to buy things... That feeling of independence!Do you still have that excitement today? Do you jump out of bed, eager to start a new day? Or are you tired, even slightly depressed?Perhaps you've lost touch with your own special *dream* over the years. What was your dream? Have you thought about it lately?. . .

The Deep Roots of Integrity

I planted 81 trees this spring. Those trees with large root systems will surely grow strong and healthy, even if they look like just a twig above the ground. Those with smaller root systems are in for a rough ride, even if they have several feet of trunk to them already.So, too, with people. Those of us who have nurtured our roots, our values, our integrity, what nobody else can see, will al. . .

Feeling Grouchy? Here's What to Do

I woke up this morning feeling sour. No. That's an understatement. My throat was tight. My head was foggy. I felt like wearing a sandwich board that read, "Crabby. Do Not Touch." I sat in bed for a moment and tried to figure out why I was feeling so irritable. But that's kind of pointless, isn't it? Regardless of whether it's hormones, sleep deprivation, or just a plain-and-simple bad mood, I s. . .

Yes You Can

If you could change one thing in your life today, what would it be? Why don't you have some of the things you'd like to have, and why do you have some? What's the reason for the inconsistency?Do you find yourself wondering what people think of you? Has that line of thinking ever made you doubt your abilities and your potential?Do you ever catch yourself thinking 'I can't do that, I'm not good e. . .

Create a Network and Catapult Your Job Search

Networking is still known as a great job-search strategy, yet it eludes some individuals simply because they don’t know how to go about it. Individuals also tend to shy away from networking because it’s time consuming. Unlike online résumé submission or folding a résumé, stuffing it in an envelope, and adhering a stamp, networking requires far more time and dedication. The results, however, can. . .

Avoid a Three-ring Circus with These New Interviewing Str...

I referenced the circus because I just finished another interviewing book that recommends asking for the job before leaving the interview. I can envision up to 15 qualified professionals each asking the interviewer for the job. If each asks for the job, doesn’t that make the question null and void … cross out each other’s great gesture? If everyone jumps through the same hoop, performing like a. . .

Start Your Day on Your Terms

Most of us start the day like we’re trying to catch a train. We wake up, grab a cup of coffee, look at the paper and listen to the news. We rush out of the house to make an appointment or deadline or to put the finishing touches on a project. From deadline to appointment it goes. When we leave work we have other responsibilities and obligations, and it doesn’t end until we go to. . .

Knowledge is Power ... So, Keep Your Mouth Closed To Keep...

Did you ever wonder why it sometimes seems that communications is lacking within an organization or corporate culture? It is one of those frustrating situations that appear to put a halt to positive productivity. You meander around trying to gather hacked information that you feel is important, yet the one person that should know the whole story "doesn't know a thing." Then, at the last minu. . .